Dear Brennan,
When Ian turned 6 months old I wrote him a letter from the bottom of my heart, and I want to share those words with you as well with a little bit of revision. You and Ian light up my life, and make it perfect!
Today, you are now a whole, half of a year old! And, just as you have grown over those past six months, so has my love for you. Just when I think I can't possibly love you anymore than I already do, I wake up the next morning to a love deeper than I can understand. Your smile warms my heart, and melts my soul. Those large dark eyes of yours make me melt. That sweet laugh makes all my troubles go away. And, when you wrap your arms around me, I feel like everything in this world is perfect, because it is with you! You complete our family. You were just what we needed to round us out, and create balance.
But, as you will find out much too soon, this world is not perfect. You will soon realize that very few things in this beautiful life are promised. As your mom, I want to be the one to tell you that, despite the uncertainties of this life, there are things that will always remain true. I am not the best mom the world has ever known... and I will never claim to be, know that I try, and fail and it is ok to fail, this is how we learn and grow. But, I hope that you will trust me, and have faith in what I do know:
There will be moments when you feel sad, upset, or may even question God. And, in those moments, I want you to know that everything that happens, is for a reason. You may never understand what that reason is, but you must trust that God knows what He is doing.
There will be moments when you feel scared or alone. And, in those moments, I want you to know that you are never alone. I am, and will always, be with you - even when we aren't sitting side by side.
There will be moments when you fall down. And, in those moments, I want you to know that I will always be there to pick you up.It is good to fall once in awhile, I don't expect you to be perfect, perfect is boring. I will always have faith in you. I will always believe in you. Never let anyone tell you you can't do something. You can do anything.
There will be moments when you must choose between right and wrong. And, in those moments, I hope you will always choose to do the right thing. Always treat others as you would like to be treated. Always, always strive to be the person God knows you can be. Listen to your heart. If you have to think about it - it's wrong.
But then, there will be moments when you know you have chosen to do wrong. And, in those moments, I want you to know that I love you.
I do not know much. But, I have learned a few things in my short time here on earth thus far. I am certain that this life will not be perfect. It will be a life that is not always easy and things will happen that do not seem fair. But, this life you have been given is a beautiful one. We are not promised tomorrow, so live this day like it is your last. Tell those you love, just how much they mean to you. Always be kind, for you never know what others may be dealing with in their lives. Never stay angry. Always be the first to say you are sorry. Keep your promises. Never be too quick to judge. Always stop to help someone. Forgive easily. Admit when you are wrong. Have confidence in yourself. Trust that God is always good - He knows what He's doing.
Always carry with you the laid back attitude, and large smile that I see in you today, everyday.
No matter what each day may bring you, I hope you will close you eyes each night, knowing that, when all else fails, there is one thing in this life that has always been, and will always remain certain: I love you with everything that I am. (And so does your daddy).
I love you!
Mommy
